I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
