What did we do last night that was yellow?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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