So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
