Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
can u get pink eye on your cock?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He? As in you personified your dick?
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Randomize
