Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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