Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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