You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
