hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
pop tarts are not kleenex
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Randomize
