His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Bring me that man meat
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
