also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
