Its about making memories worth repressing
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
