This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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