yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
So many bounce houses so little time
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
