seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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