I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
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