dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
