Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
