Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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