In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
