Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Randomize
