if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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