So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
