Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
