my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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