just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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