it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
