Small penises have feelings too.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize