Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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