I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
