a queef is a wish your heart makes.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
