She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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