You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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