I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
