no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize