I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize