well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
