yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize