is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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