She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize