the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
