We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
