so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
