ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
What a dumb baby whore.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Randomize
