when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
My brain says no but my pants say off.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
