no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
