Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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