Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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