don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
