Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Man, jail baloney is awful.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize