its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize