I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
